Post Birthday Freebie

Sorry, I don't have a whole lot to post today. I didn't have a chance to even sit down, much less write a wrap up of Universal Florida and Walt Disney World.

In case you don't happen to be Facebook friends with me--yesterday was my birthday.

I turned 52.

And as I mentioned to one of my FB buddies who wished me a happy birthday, "Age is all in your mind . . . and I will always be a kid."

Too bad, the body doesn't always retain its youthfulness!

The only problem with thinking you are much younger than you are is simply that you can take it too far.

Me--I'm just happy to be alive, to live a full life by enjoying the nature and people around me. I have fun and act silly sometimes, but I don't dress like I'm my daughter--that would just be creepy!

Anyway, my birthday was spent doing all sorts of errands--and not the fun type of errands where I shop for ME!, thus is the life of an adult.

By the time, I took my kidlet to swim, I was ready for a margarita, which my lovely friend, Margaret, provided!. . .erm, I'm not talking about myself here, I actually have a friend whose name is Margaret, actually more than one friend named Margaret, but this is swim mom Margaret, the other Margaret is my writing friend, Meg, whose real name is Margaret, but I know her as Meg.

More coffee is needed!

My book challenge, HOW TO LOSE WEIGHT WHILE EATING BONBONS by Candy D. Licious is FREE for the next five days! Just follow the title link to Amazon

Deanne and Mary--I'll find some way of making up the $1.99 you spent on it. Thank you so much for your support!  Yes, I only sold two books. Considering I didn't do any type of promoting, this does not surprise me!

As always, ANY review of this book is welcome. I don't care--well, I DO care, but--if you thought this book sucked, please take the time to post a review.

And if you don't want to read about my dirty little secrets--the weight GAINING kind--then don't pick up this book.

Or if you don't want a couple of my wonderful recipes, then don't pick up this book.

Or if you simply want to enjoy the Youtube video, my daughter's German teacher showed the class the first day of school, then don't pick up this book, watch this . . .

Okay, I think this is too funny! I might post more of them in the future.

 

Later, Peeps!

Vacation--Overheard and Observed

While on vacation, we had numerous opportunities to eavesdrop. You have to remember that all these rides aren't just rides like you would find at a regular amusement park. These rides tell a story.

Here are a few gems I wrote down after a long day at the park.

Tower of Terror, at Hollywood Studios in Disney World

An elevator dropping ride. The ride is computerized to have a different sequence of drops every time.

Parent to child: "It's just like a trampoline, where go up and down. . . "

Cast member at gate, under her breath: "And up and down, and down and up, over and over."

Haunted House, Magic Kingdom at Disney World

a continuous ride through the mansion in a doom-mobile

Parent to child: "It's not scary. It's just fun stuff to look at."

. . . only if you like being creeped out in the dark.

Star Tours, Hollywood Studios at Disney World

 

3-D motion simulator ride, with different combinations of adventures

 

Kid whining about not being able to see the screen.

 

Dad turns to him, curling his fingers into a fist. "This is you shutting it."

The kid shut it.

 

 

Same kid: "Why is Yoda staring at me?"

 

Hubby under his breath: "Because you gassed everyone out with the fart you just laid."

 

Space Mountain, Magic Kingdom

 

roller coaster in the dark, each 'rocket' is two sets of three seats, front to back

 

Large woman trying to get into roller coaster seat: "Oh, I think I'm too tall."

 

My kidlet, under her breath: "I don't think it's a height issue."

 

 And:

My Kidlet: "My shirt's all wrinkled."
Hubs: "Don't worry, it will all sweaty soon."
 

The day before we left Disney, we were stuck on Space Mountain for 20 minutes.

 

My kidlet said: "It's family bonding time!"

I think we taught her well, don't you? :-)

 

And last, but not least . . .

 

Hubs to TSA agent: "Are you sure you want me to take my shoes off? I've been at a theme park all morning."

 

TSA agent was not amused!

 

Theme park wrap-up over the next few days!

 

Later, Peeps!



Weighty Wednesday -- How to Lose Weight While Eating Bonbons

Two days ago a writer friend posted a link to J. A. Konrath's blog.  Joe is the creator of Jack Daniels, a female detective, and the stories are suspense. Joe is also a huge advocate to self-publishing. Since he left traditional publishing 1) he's made more money, 2) sets his own deadlines, 3) been far more productive as a writer.

That aside, he posed a challenge to his blog readers: publish a story in eight hours, by doing everything yourself, cover, writing, and editing.

This was the kick in the tookus that I needed. I had been wanting to take my blogs and somehow merge them with my candy recipes. When I started putting the blogs together, I just became overwhelmed by the process.

Until this challenge.

This challenge excited me as a writer. Guess I do thrive on deadlines!

The book would be relatively short, only 10,000 words or so. And some of it has been cut and paste, a couple blogs and my recipes.

On Monday, I designed the cover using Amazon's Cover Creator.

And on Tuesday I started writing, and merging blogs, and writing, and editing, and spell checking, and formatting, and tweaking.

This is my final product.

And here's the link to How to Lose Weight While Eating Bonbons.

The price is currently set at $1.99, BUT will be free this weekend!

But those of you who have enjoyed my insight with my Weighty Wednesday blogs or want a couple of candy recipes, then please take a look and buy this book!

Not very subliminal of me, was it?

And no, it's not under my 'real' name. I wanted something fun and catchy. Yes, I know it sounds like a porn star's name, but, well, there you have it.

Later, Peeps!

Post Vacation Tips and Tricks -- General

Yes, I took a vacation.

Yes, we went back to Florida--Universal and Disney World.

Yes, things are changing--mainly, WDW, but I gleaned a few more pieces of wisdom while on vacation. I'll break the rides and stuff down in a couple other posts.

Ten Tips

1--If it is humanly possible, DO NOT GO TO FLORIDA DURING THE SUMMER! Yes, we had no option since we can't take our kidlet out of school to hit the parks during the off season. Suffice it to say, we were there with all the other parents who have to vacation during a very short window of opportunity during school breaks. . . It almost made this parent want to start homeschooling just to have the option of going at a different time.

2--If you must go during peak season do as I suggested--study the maps, know your families likes and dislikes (don't waste your time standing in line for the Beauty and the Beast show if everyone wants to ride rides), plan your day, park hop if you can. We usually did two parks every day, but did manage three parks one day. Yes, it was tiring, but sometimes you have no choice.

3--Find current maps online. Disney switched up their maps (HATE IT) by printing a map of the park by placing an image of the park with true North at the top of the map, which means you have to figure out where the park entrance is in relation to the maps and work from there. This is instead of previous incarnations of the map where the entrance is at the bottom of the map.

4--Disney also messed with the details of the map. The park looks like an artist's rendering of an aerial picture of the park with numbers on each building. This makes it difficult to figure out a) where you are, b) where you want to go, with out stopping and opening the map to figure out what all the circled numbers are in reference to. Did I mention that I HATE this new map?? And what makes it really bad is that I'm very familiar with the parks and I was very confused looking at these maps! But they never asked my opinion. Sometimes change is just change, and not necessarily for the better!

5--Pick up a Times Guide at every park. If you are at a park over a weekend, get a new Times Guide on Sunday. Yes, sometimes there are drastic changes with rides that are closing for refurbishment, or the night time parades and fireworks will change, or even the park closings. Many times Magic Kingdom was open until Midnight or later, but then when school starts and attendance lags, they close the park earlier. When they have Mickey's Not So Scary Halloween, they will shut the park down, UNLESS you have paid to attend the Halloween Party (you have to get a special wrist band).

6--The earlier you get out of bed to get to the park, the fewer people there are. . . . This is true, BUT remember there are tens of thousands of people in these parks, fewer doesn't mean none, it means less humanity in your near vicinity than there will be when you are wandering around the park at 11:00 AM. Take advantage of the Early Magic Hours if you are staying at a hotel on site. The Extra Magic Hours in the evening aren't as good since everyone from the other parks will converge on the one park with later hours.

7--People will simply stop in the middle of the walkways. Seriously, if you need to have a family consultation pull off to the side.

8--People are rude, clueless, and will use their kids as battering rams. TRUTH. If kids aren't available, they will use electric scooters, empty baby strollers, wheelchairs, or their fat grandma to push through a crowd . . .and into your shins or Achilles tendon depending on which way they are going.

9--Florida is freaking hot in the summer. The temps aren't bad, usually in the lower 90's, it's the 100% humidity that will get you. You will sweat in body places you never thought it humanly possible to sweat. Keep hydrated. Most of our crankiness was due to dehydration.

10--Again, parents please school your children--or husband--to NOT FART IN AN ENCLOSED RIDE. This is just gross and rude. Yes, I'm talking to the kid who let one rip while sitting in the simulator while waiting for the Star Tours ride to start . . . there was a reason Yoda was staring at you!

More info coming this week!

Later, Peeps!

Dragon Days of Summer excerpt

It seems like it's been forever since I've blogged, but it's only been about three weeks. Actually, by now, I thought I would have had shoulder surgery and be in an arm sling that would totally immobilize my left shoulder.

But I cancelled my surgery because the cervical spinal injections seem to be taking care of the immediate problem . . . for now.

I hope y'all took the opportunity to download my books when they were free, even if you haven't had a chance to read them. Sometimes I download books and then finally get around to reading them 6-7 months later!

To that end, I thought I'd post a very short excerpt from DRAGON DAYS OF SUMMER, Book Four of The Goblin's Apprentice series.

***

 

Chapter One

Parenting 101--Pester your Kid

 

I stared out the car window and watched the grass flash by. Spring had been wet this year, which made everything grow like weeds, including the weeds.

 “So, do you want to talk about it?” Mom asked as she drove us home.

The simple answer would be “No”, but sometimes Mom just didn’t get it. Two hours of mind-numbing detention. Two hours of sitting in the same room as Bubba. Two hours spent in a troll hole would have been better than the complete and utter boredom of the school library. What a total waste of time.

It didn’t help that school was almost over for the year and Mrs. Dillard didn’t see the need to assign us any homework. It wasn’t like I could pull my Celestian physiology book out of my backpack to start reading up on mermaids, dryads, or trolls. Or whip out my sword and practice a few moves. Or even try manipulating stuff with my earth magic.

Though . . . come to think of it, the thought of calling a dust bunny to attack Bubba did have its merits.

What was the point of being a goblin’s apprentice if the goblin never bothered to show up?  It wasn’t my problem the aforementioned goblin was being held captive on the alternate realm of Celestia, was it?  Where was his replacement?

I softly snorted. Why did I even bother to pretend I was still the goblin’s apprentice?

No one was banging on my door asking for my help with the war. In fact, I hadn’t heard a peep from anyone in months.

And my little adventure with the leprechauns, pixies and faeries didn’t count. Leprechauns only cared about themselves. Their only concern was how to use the war to their advantage.  Faeries and pixies were minor Mythicals; no one on the Celestian Council cared about them or their contributions to the war effort.

K’vn and Rory were the only Mythicals I had contact with, well, other than Zinzara—but a brownie and gnome weren’t exactly challenging opponents to train with. And Little Dude had disappeared when Darien was released from Castle Dragonskull’s dungeon.

I missed Little Dude. Things always grew exciting when he popped up.

 

Later, Peeps!



FREEBIES!

Too Late! Sorry!
FREEBIES!!

 

 

In celebration of my birth month -- and my inability to write a blog this month -- I'm offering my e-books for free!

 

If you've wanted to read them, but didn't have the money, now is the chance to download them.
 

Or if you live in another country and want to practice reading English, now is your chance to download them.
 

Or if you have a friend who wants to read them, but his/her mom won't let them spend the money, now is your chance to spread the word for the free download.

FEEL FREE TO SHARE THIS BLOG LINK AND THE INFORMATION WITH ANYONE AND EVERYONE!

 

FREE In chronological order:

 

To Gnome Me Is To Love Me -- August 5-7
 

The Fast and the FAERIEous -- August 8-10
 

A Maze of Monster Mix-Ups -- August 11-13
 

 For Whom the Bell Trolls-- August 14-16

Sugar Plum Disaster-- August 17-19 

Lost Leprechaun Loot  -- August 20-22

 

And if for some reason, you missed the free download time, I'm offering

ALL of my books for free on August 23-24!!

They are all here on my Amazon author page, M. A. Golla
 

Hints & Suggestions:

• The linked books above are for the US Amazon store. If you want the Amazon store in the United Kingdom, Germany, France, Spain, Italy, Japan, India, Canada, or Brazil, then click these links and it will take you to my Amazon author page for each country.
• Choose the free book and download to your Kindle or computer/phone with free Kindle app.
• Verify the free book prior to downloading! Amazon runs on Greenwich Mean Time . . . and I haven't a clue as to what that entails for other parts of the world! 
• Did you know that Amazon charges the author for every book returned? So please, make sure the book is free before you download it. I don't want to have to pay Amazon . . .

Enjoy my stories!

As always. feel free to post a review, good or not so good, on Amazon.

Thanks!

Later, Peeps!

 

 



Tips and Tricks -- Universal Studios Florida

Universal Studios Florida park is set up with different themes, but the themes aren't so different that you need to pay much attention to it. Again, find a map. Study the map before you get to the park. You can pick up a map after you enter the turnstile, but by studying the map you can chose the appropriate ride/shows you and your family wants to visit.


There are quite a few shows--many of them we didn't see--but the rides are phenomenal!

This year, the Transformers ride is new. I never rode it, so I can't help you there. Sorry! Shoot, even Universal hasn't updated their maps online. When they were putting it in, It seemed to be on the lake, as you walk toward Men In Black and the Simpson's rides.

I didn't do this quite right, but click on the picture and it will take you to the YouTube video trailer . . . I hope.

I'll track this park journey straight in from the turnstiles, clockwise around the lake. Some of the shows I won't include, mainly because we never bothered to see them! So there are shows to watch if you want to sit in the Florida heat--check your maps for show times and listings.

Despicable Me Minion Mayhem

This is where Jimmy Neutron used to be. You sit on bench seating, which moves with the action on the movie. Totally Awesome Fun!

Minions Rule!

 

Shrek 4-D

Another really fun 'interactive' ride. Stationary seats are available.

 

Hollywood Rip Ride Rocket

This is the red roller coaster that you see throughout the park. It goes straight up and then straight down. . . it looks worse than it really is. The fun part of this ride is that you can pick the music you want to listen to while you ride, everything from Country to Rap.

NO Express Passes

Loose items must be placed in lockers prior to getting in line.

Singles line is open sometimes

 

Twister

This is sort of like a show, but you're standing, so it's not. You might get wet. It's okay, but don't waste your time if you are a ride person . . . ride something else twice.

 

Revenge of the Mummy

A MUST SEE!

This is a wonderful inside roller coaster-type of ride that also tells a story. It's not constant movement as it stops to show you a different part of the story before it continues on the ride.

Loose items must be placed in lockers prior to getting in line.

 

Disaster!

Again, if you're strapped for time, skip this one. I thought it felt like the Studio Backlot Tour at Disney's Hollywood Studios

 

MEN IN BLACK Alien Attack

Lots of fun as you target aliens . . . and other ride cars to earn point! Quick spins and jerkiness depending on who's steering.

Loose items must be placed in lockers prior to getting in line.

 

The Simpsons Ride

Another MUST DO. This ride is totally fun. There are three different levels to this ride and pretty much it's a crap shoot as to which level you get. You ARE in the Simpson's movie.

 

Woody Woodpecker Kid Zone

(Curious George playground, animal shows, Barney, Fievel's Playland, Woody Woodpecker's Nuthouse Coaster (36" tall)

 

ET Adventures

At the very edge of Woody Woodpecker's Kid Zone. You ride on bicycles to save ET as you ride through the woods, and into the air, as you take ET back to his home planet.

Dated. Fun, but dated.

 

Terminator 2 : 3-D

Part stunt show, part movie, part interactive. It's a lot of fun, but again, if you just miss the show, you will have to wait a long time before the doors open again.

Timing is everything here.



Enjoy the park!

Later, peeps!

Tips and Tips -- Universal Florida -- Islands of Adventure



Islands of Adventure

There are two parks at Universal Florida (Islands of Adventure and Universal Studios), plus City Walk, along with three hotels (Hard Rock, Portofino, and Royal Pacific).






As I recommended before, if you stay on site at a Universal hotel, you will get an Express Pass for the days you go to the park. During the busy season, this is critical! Who wants to spend hours waiting in line for one ride??

I don't.

Even with the Express Pass there will be a wait . . . a shorter wait, but still a wait.

And my #1 suggestion?

Don't even bother to go to this park if your kids love roller coasters, but aren't tall enough to ride!

The tallest height required to ride all rides, including the Incredible Hulk, The Dragon Challenge (previously called Dueling Dragons) and Dr. Doom's Fearfall is 54 inches, and the Harry Potter ride is 48 inches.

Measure your kid carefully!

True, there is tons of stuff to do other than roller coasters, but it little Billy's heart is set on riding Harry Potter, but he's only 46 inches, he will be doomed to disappointment! Especially now that that woman fell to her death on the Texas Giant roller coaster. If they can't click you in tightly, you will be removed from the ride.

Embarrassing, yes, but it's better than dying.

Here is a link to download the Universal Maps.

Islands of Adventure

Find a map. Study the map.

And you'll notice the item most visited is up at the top of the map, The Wizarding World of Harry Potter. Top of the map means at the back of the park. The shortest way is through Seuss Landing, just keep walking to the right . . . and follow the crowd.

I'll talk to you about this area when I get to it later in the blog.

Breaking down the park, section by section, I'll starting with the first zone to your right after you enter the park.

Seuss Landing.

As you might have figured out, this area is all things Dr. Seuss, it's main function is to keep little tykes entertained. We rode all the rides. It's fun, but not exactly the type of fun we roller coaster people crave.

Sorry, but there is one ride with a minimum height requirement:

The High in the Sky Trolley Ride--34 inches--

above the walkways, like a small roller coaster

Caro-Seuss-el--

merry-go-round

One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish--

wet goofiness

The Cat in the Hat--

inside ride, tells story

If I Ran the Zoo--

outside play area

 

The Lost Continent



 

Sorry, but we tend to walk right through this area. We did see the Eight Voyage of Sinbad, and tried to see Poseidon's Fury, but it shut down--thunderstorm, yanno.

The Eight Voyage of Sinbad Stunt Show--

self explanatory-- stunt show

The Mystic Fountain--

never found it, okay, never looked for it!

Poseidon's Fury--

special effects guided tour

 

The Wizarding World of Harry Potter

 

Everyone wants to visit Hogsmead Village. You have to go through the village to get to the Harry Potter ride, take your time later to walk around after you go for a ride. Take time to look in the windows, go into the stores and sample Butterbeer. I personally like the regular Butterbeer over the frozen variety. You can also eat at the Three Broomsticks. The last time we went, they wouldn't let you just look around the Three Broomsticks, you had to buy something--you can get Pumpkin Juice or Butterbeer in here, along with a variety of meals.

 

If you want to visit Ollivander's wand shop, you have to wait for the 'show'. About 20 people are let in at a time . . . and it's a VERY tight space. One lucky kiddo is chosen to pick a wand. Yes, it's identical to the movie scene. The you then shuffle into the gift shop . . . another tight fit. Lots and lots of really cool stuff. Be prepared to pry open your wallet. Last year, a wizard's robe cost around $100.

 





 Harry Potter and the Forbidden Journey --

This the ride you want to ride. Think of it as a compilation of the first four books/movies rolled into one. Be aware that ALL LOOSE ARTICLES MUST BE PUT IN A LOCKER, prior to getting in line. This means purses, cameras, backpacks, etc.

*Recommendations: Go through the line to experience the castle and the show. Once you go through the line and want to ride again, find the singles line.

There are NO EXPRESS PASSES.*

Flight of the Hippogriff --
A fun little roller coaster for all members of the family. Travels past Hagrid's hut and the nest of the hippogriff.
Dragon Challenge --
This used to be called Dueling Dragons. Not much has changed with this double roller coaster, except how the path winds to the door of the castle--You'll see Ron's flying car. The dragons are the red or the blue. They are both fun coasters with loop-de-loops, but I think the red side is a little better.

Jurassic Park

 

This section of the park has an 'educational' feel to it. There are two additional areas, one is the Discovery center, where you can grow and hatch your own dino egg, plus other interesting stuff. There is also a jewelry store that has a variety of amber products--not surprising, and no, I didn't see any mosquitos sealed in the amber. The other area is a kid's playground, called Camp Jurassic.

Jurassic Park River Adventure --

Fun boat ride with drop, you will get wet

Pteranodon Flyers --

Two-person 'fliers' that you ride above the walkways. Fun, but mainly for kids. Adults MUST be accompanied by a kid to ride.

 

Toon Lagoon

 

This is a fun area. Until last summer, we usually walked right through this area since we don't like walking around wet. If you plan to ride these rides, plan to bring a change of clothes. Oh, the janitorial service is hard-core about NOT letting you use the hand dryers to dry yourself. For a small fee, there are drying booths available around both these rides. There is also a play area called Me Ship, THE OLIVE. Yes, it's a boat. 

Dudley Do-Right's Ripsaw Falls --

serious log flume ride.  Very fun, but you WILL GET SOAKING WET

Popeye & Bluto's Bilge-Rat Barges--

raft ride, You WILL GET SOAKING WET

 

Marvel Super Hero Island

 

This is a fun area, too. The rides are a little more intense than some of the other areas. If you have health issues or little kids, you will probably want to sit this section out.

Amazing Adventures of Spider-Man--

Very cool indoor 3-D ride. It does jerk your car around, so if  you have neck issues, you need to be warned.

Doctor Doom's Fearfall--

Zips you into the air and then drops you. If you liked Tower of Terror, you'll like this one. Great view at the top.

Storm Force Accelatron --

spinning teacups type of ride

The Incredible Hulk Coaster--

This coaster is literally a monster! Fast acceleration, lots of loops and spins. I've ridden this ride over 10 times and every time, I tend to black out a for a couple of seconds. Must use the lockers to store loose items.

 



 That's it for this side of Universal Florida!

 

I'll post about the other side tomorrow.

 

Later, Peeps!