Happiness is . . .

Being the best ME I can possibly be.

 

 

 

So many people go through life unhappy.

 

I'm too fat.

 

I'm too short.

 

I'm too ugly.

 

My nose is too big.

 

Heck, there are a couple of industries (plastic surgeons, to name the main one) that prey upon the population who thinks 'fixing' stuff will make them happy.

 

In case, you wondered, IT DOESN'T.

 

Happiness has to come from inside yourself.

 

Other people can't make you happy. And it isn't your job to make others happy. Oh, your new positive attitude might help make others happy, but don't take it personally if you're shot down or called a Pollyanna.

 

So how does one become happy?

 

It really isn't hard.

 

All you have to do is focus on the positive things in your life. Reduce the negativity in your own thoughts, words, and around you.

 

I'm sure you've heard the phrase, "One bad apple will ruin the whole bushel." Well, there's a reason, it's sage advice . . . because it's true.

 

Have you ever people watched a group trash-talking their spouses? Or making mean comments about various people? Yes, I have to say that women tend to be the worst instigators of this.

 

Negativity breeds negativity.

 

So how does one become HAPPY?

 

The first step is to try to remove outside negativity. If you have a friend that tends to be negative or causes you to stress out every time you see her, then you need to distance yourself from this person. Remove them from your contacts. Block them on your texts. Hide their Facebook messages, or even unfriend them.

 

YOU DO NOT OWE THEM A REASON. You need to worry about your mental health and happiness. Do not allow them to undo the positivity your are sowing by opening the mental door to allow them back in.

 

The second step is to try to change your own mindset. If you are unhappy in your job or school, then find the positive things at your job or school to keep from dwelling on the negative aspects.

 

Perhaps you don't like a particular teacher's teaching style? Just try to figure out what they want from you as a student and provide that . . . And get a calendar to count down the days that you have to deal with this particular teacher.

 

Now, it's time to look inward and meditate over what aspects of your life that make you happy.

 

Focus on the simple things.

 

Here are a couple of things that make me happy: walking, making candy, my rose garden, gardening, crocheting, reading, writing, and when I was able to ride--my horse.

 

When I'm walking I enjoy nature around me. The sound of birds, the burble of the creek, the wind through the trees . . . just nature in general.

 

Gardening is back-breaking labor, but I can reap the reward of enjoying my backyard oasis.

 

Making candy is also back-breaking, but it makes me happy making others happy when they eat it. Erm, I wished more people would stroke my ego by telling me how good it is, but I can't have everything, right?

 

And the list goes on . . .

 

An interesting change happens when you become happy--more people want to hang with you, your self-confidence sky rockets, your visage and posture change reflecting your inner happiness.

 

You discover that all those things you hated about yourself don't really matter any longer. You start caring about your health, which in turn, allows you to lose weight. You start exercising because it makes you happy, not because you have to.

 

And just like negativity breeds negativity, the opposite is also true.

 

Positivity breeds positivity, which is the secret to happiness.

 

Think about it.

 

MAG's 



Smile for Me

My hubby thinks I'm weird--okay, there's no need to go into detail here, but he married me, therefore he is stuck with me!

Back on topic: When I go on my 4.25 mile daily walk, I tend to greet the people on the walking path: walkers, joggers, and bikers. Usually I give a small wave--raising my hand-- and a 'good morning' said with a smile. I don't want to interrupt their workout, but I want there to be an awareness and an acknowledgment that I saw them, therefore they saw me.

My theory is that if my cold, dead body is found, they will think, "Hey, that's that weird lady who wears a red sweatshirt and insists upon intruding into my la-la world by being cheerful."

Then again, there are theories that people who are targeted are those who won't make eye contact, or are so into their tunes they don't know what the heck is going on around them.

I'm aware. I see them.

In other words--I could identify them in a line-up. :-) **bwahahaha**

Anyway, I've been doing this for a couple of years now. Sometimes people glare at me. Sometimes they smile. Sometimes they lift their hand in greeting, but they catch themselves wondering why their hand was up. And, of course, many times I'm ignored . . . especially by women when they travel in pairs.

Go figure. Like I'm a threat to their womanhood. *sheesh*

Every now and again, I hit gold.

One was an older gentleman by the name of Ron. I usually see him walking M-F on the trail, and mainly in passing as we are headed different directions. Sometimes, if he's ahead of me, I'll play catch-up to push myself harder to see if I can make up the distance to chat with him.

Another gentleman was Kenyon who I passed as he jogged. He's a slow jogger and I'm a quick walker. I haven't seen him in awhile, but his workout hours might not be the same as mine.

Then there is the lady jogger who stopped to alert me to a bobcat in the area . . . she didn't alert the next two walkers as I followed her along the path, just me. I don't know her name, but she recognized me as I greeted her numerous times while we worked out.

And just this last Saturday, I met Jacob.

Jacob is a serious biker--he wears the spandex bike clothes and he's riding seven days a week. Usually all I have time for is "Morni--" and a hand wave before he zooms away. As I said, I don't want to interrupt anyone's workout, but I do want to greet them.

But this Saturday was different when Jacob stopped his bike to introduce himself.

I'm still smiling about it.

I'm not doing much, just greeting the people I meet along the way. And I like to think that my greeting makes them smile just a little and approach their day a little differently.

Over the years, I've noticed that nastiness is contagious. But then again, so is cheerfulness. Why not spread a little joy along the way?

Later, Peeps!

Gloomy Weather, Gloomy Mood

Over the last few weeks, my soul has been heavy, weighed down.

The analytical side of my brain wants to figure out why, while my creative side is simply huddled in a corner with an afghan wrapped around her, rocking back and forth.

This is known as a blue funk.

My writing has been at a standstill for weeks.

I haven't wanted to finish the Angels All Around afghan for Brenda Novak's For the Cure auction in May. Only two more angel squares before I stitch it together!

I haven't been reading, though I did download about seven more books onto my Kindle. All I've been doing are crosswords and playing Jewels Star on my phone.

Normally, it happens to me in October or November, but I think I was busy making candy, or crocheting the gazillion afghans I gave away, that I simply didn't have time for it.

It could simply be this cold weather languishing around. We did get a few warm days, but the cold and rain two nights ago successfully put a stopper in my happiness.

Fast forward a little--So I was chatting with a swim mom friend, Margaret (yes, that really is her name and she's a horse person, too!) a few days ago, asking her how her weekend was. She was so excited because her hubs and kiddo had been on a Boy Scout camping trip all weekend, and she could ride her horse.

She did more than just ride. She lived at the barn.

Wow, talk about being green with envy!

This is where our conversation changed a little. Margaret mentioned that I needed to smell manure and hay again, to inhale that special spiciness only horses have.

She mentioned she wanted me to ride the horse since she doesn't have enough time to get him into condition to sell as a hunter.

A win-win for both of us--I would be riding again, and she would be getting her horse into shape.

When I told hubs about this, his comment was that he didn't want to own another horse. Well, I don't want to own one either at this point in my life, but I did want a project to work on. And this riding would be a fun project. 

Along with filling a dark, empty spot in my heart.

About a year and a half ago, I started riding a horse that was my old barn owner's pasture horse, but riding again lost its luster to ride simply for riding's sake. I didn't have a reason to keep riding a pasture horse. It served no purpose, so I stopped.

But Margaret's horse would serve a purpose. I would have a purpose in my life that is currently missing.

I think I'll take her up on it.

All I have to do is wait for the weather to cooperate, because riding in the cold and wet is not on my agenda!

Later, Peeps.