The past few weeks have been very exciting on the writing front . . . but not for me.
I've had to fake smile and send email congrats to numerous people from contest finals to acquiring a new literary agent to garnering multi-book contracts to selling a gazillion books to readers in the UK to . . .
Get the picture?
Yeah, jealous some. Totally bit by the green monster.
In my mind, I know this is stupid, but my heart differs. It's hard. It hurts. And I'm tired.
I've been trying to break into this biz for over 10 years. For ten years, 99% of the feedback I've received has been negative. It's the nature of the business, but it doesn't make it easy. My skin might be tough, but my soul is pockmarked with despair.
I'm sad that these stories that I've written and love won't be making it into the hands of children. Parents won't be spending their money on an unknown author--ME.
I can't say that I really blame them.
But one thing that I have learned this year is that I can't MAKE people buy my books.
I can't make reviewers READ my books.
I can't force readers who promised a review for a free book to REVIEW my story. Heck, out of all the books that I gave away for reviews, I've only seen a 2% return in the form of reviews.
Hand-selling my books is out of the question, because they're electronic. I've done everything I can think of in the form of publicity to get my stories out there for kids to read. But nothing has worked.
I'm beat. Tired. Done. I quit.
Will I continue writing?
Probably. A spark was ignited when I saw Janet Reid post a flash fiction contest. I came up with a story and submitted it--it's a nod to Stephen King's CARRIE--but there will be hundreds of entries to choose from, and my story style isn't their preference.
It is what it is.
Dealing with the business of publishing is hard, and I need to heal my soul and make it whole again.
In order to do that I want to give away one of my currently published stories to anyone who wants to read one.
All you have to do is ask.
Send an email to me at magolla@cox.net with the title of the book you want and I'll send you a copy of that story.
That's it. No having to fan my FB page, or follow me on Twitter, or do handstands while chewing gum. I hate the hoops and games that so many authors resort to. Just simply ask. I will provide the story. Period.
This offer is good until November 1, 2011.
Later, Peeps!
Aw, Margaret, I know how you feel. The highs in this business can be really high, which makes the lows that much harder to bear. It can chew you up and spit you out.
ReplyDeleteSending a big hug your way.
I felt your warm embrace. Thanks, Marilyn. It must be something about this time of year, because I think I went through this depression about this time LAST year!
ReplyDeleteI also hate all the "gimmickry" (I just made that word up , I think) that people use to promote their stuff. I actually think what you're doing right now is truly what writing is about - getting your stories in to the hands of other people, even if you GIVE them away. that's the real deal, margaret. That's what storytelling and a true love for writing is about.
ReplyDeleteIT's NOT about validation or literary agents or somebody deciding your story is deserving of an award. It's not about blog whoring or prize dangling or prostituting one's self, one's voice or one's dream for "the industry". It's about doing what YOU love, on YOUR terms, in a way that makes YOU feel fulfilled.
Screw 'em Margie, they really don't matter. Really. REALLY. The only reason you think they matter is because other people have convinced you that they do ("they" being the industry, not any individual).
I think you're more 'real' and 'valid' than most of the writers out there. So there!
Aw, thanks, Jody!
ReplyDeleteI'm hitting a rough patch right now, but it's wonderful to know that you have my back!
I love your writing! I have since I read that one story for WTMB. I still remember most of it as it hooked me. Were you a perfect writer? NO, and it didn't matter because I loved your voice.
ReplyDeleteDo I like your stories? You bet! Because you're my friend. Maybe that's why I bought the first one, but not the next. YOU give me the chance to escape, if only for a few hours.
This business is hard. You are a success in my eyes.
Pour yourself a well deserved adult beverage, then get back to writing.
Thanks, Meg! It's so hard to think of this biz in a cold and calculating way when we put so much of ourselves into our work.
ReplyDeleteUh, FYI, the wine/whine seemed to do the trick.